Mats and Greta were inseparable playmates. They lived two blocks from each other in Aachen’s west end, and after school and on weekends they would always find some adventure to entertain themselves. One Saturday morning, Mats got the idea to make stilts. He saw some buskers in fancy Mardi Gras costumes, taller than anyone, walking through the market and thought that was really cool. How hard could it be to walk on those?
There were some poles in his dad’s garage and he screwed foot supports on one set by the time Greta came over. He was very good at building things, but he was also very good at getting people to do things for themselves; so Greta readily took up the challenge and built her own with the wood he had on hand…. It wasn’t so hard.
The hard part was learning how to balance. They couldn’t do that on the busy street and they didn’t want to do it in the local playground because then all the other kids would want to try; besides, it would be so cool to show off to the other kids once they got good at it; so in the end they disguised the poles as fishing rods and took the paved path through the university, down to the river.
It was hard to find the right spot to learn stilt walking. The ground had to be hard and smooth, but also it had to be soft in case you fell… and they did a lot of falling at the beginning. But Greta and Mats were both agile and soon they were walking quite steadily on their stilts. They even walked across the river without getting wet; yes it was actually a creek and the water was only a couple of feet deep, but they both had a great sense of accomplishment.
They continued up the bank and onto a pasture, scaring the sheep as they went by. They were doing really well until one of Greta’s stilts slipped into a vole’s hole and she fell spectacularly, twisting her ankle as she splayed out onto the grass. Angry at her predicament, she let loose with a few choice expletives that even made Mats blush.
Greta’s ankle hurt so much she couldn’t walk, and there was no way that Mats could carry her, so they just sat there in the open field and rested for a few minutes, think of ways to get home. To make matters worse, Greta had to pee. She had been holding it in for a while now, waiting for a place where she could hide behind a tree, or some tall grass, but there in the sheep’s pasture, it was all so very open… she felt the need so bad, she was sure her eyes were turning yellow.
Two of Mats’s class mates had seen them from the far end of the pasture and decided to come over and tease them because Mats always seemed to like to play with Greta more than with the other boys in his class. For them, girls were an unknowable entity and they could not understand why girls would do the funny things they would do.
As they got closer, they noticed that Mats was walking around Greta on stilts and that really peaked their curiosity. They also had seen the stilt walkers at the market and this really looked interesting.
Greta, seeing these boys coming, got very angry and asked Mats to send them away… she told him “My dam ankle hurts so bad I can’t walk, and I have to pee so bad, and I can’t do that out in this open field, especially with these boys around!”
Mats became very concerned; he knew that he couldn’t just tell them to go away… they wouldn’t, and in fact they would hang around just to tease them both. And if Greta wet her pants, there would be no end to the teasing, both here and in school. And there were two of them; and though he probably could beat them both up if he needed… that would just cause lots more trouble.
Mats got an idea, and began to walk in a circle around Greta on his stilts and called out to them to come over. Needless to say, Greta scowled and was very angry… the boys however were quite impressed.
“Can we try that?” they both asked.
But Mats looked serious for a second and said, “You know, this stilt walking takes a lot of focus, you can’t just jump up on the stilts and see what happens.”
He continued, “I think we need a contest to see who can focus the longest and the best. The person who loses is not smart enough to try. What we will do is hold hands in a circle, with our eyes closed, and the first person to open them isn’t strong enough to try the stilts, and he loses. Greta will be in the middle and she will be the judge. Don’t forget, you can’t open your eyes, even if someone makes funny noises… they may be just trying to trick you.”
Greta understood Mats’ plan immediately, and though she thought it was risky; she had to pee so bad, it was her only chance. They all got into position and Mats said, “Close your eyes and imagine yourself walking on those stilts.” The two boys closed their eyes and Greta looked at them for a few moments, before pulling down her panties and hiking up her skirt, and there in the sheltered circle of boys, she silently begin to pee. When she was done, she put herself back together and loudly said, “Mats, you opened your eyes, you lose; the other two boys get to try the stilts.”
The two other boys cheered and immediately ran to where the stilts were and began to try them. It was comical to see them trying to walk and then fall, then try again… but actually after a few minutes, they began to succeed, a few steps at a time.
After a few minutes, Mats called over his shoulder as he was helping Greta hobble back towards their home, “You guys are doing great! I bet with a little more practice, you could cross that river and walk them all the way back to my house. Greta has twisted her ankle, and I’m going to help her get home.”
Greta and Mats slowly made their way back; that was enough adventure for today day.
Author’s Note: The sculptures shown in this story are a few of the many engaging sculptures found in Aachen Germany. I’m sure they have wonderful stories behind them, but I couldn’t resist in creating one of my own.