The Grand Platz in Brussels is a fabulous square that attracts both tourists and local crazies alike. It is easy to see the attraction for tourists, the square is surrounded by old, beautifully decorated buildings augmented with statues and gilded reliefs; and of course, there are cafés where you can rest your weary tourist feet.
The locals, on the other hand come down here to have fun with the tourists. It’s not uncommon to see four or five bride’s maids with a bride in tow, selling kisses to the tourists to help pay for their drinks during their “wild night” before the wedding.
Or maybe you will see a group of girls practicing a complex group dance they want to put on YouTube. It’s fun watching them do all those crazy dance moves together.
But the most interesting character I met there was Cherise, on her duck. She stood out from the crowd, not only because of her wonderful smile, but because she wasn’t selling kisses, rather she would walk up to young guys and silently get them to buy a condom from her.
Talk about confusing messages! Actually, she didn’t talk at all; she only used sign language, so you can easily see how things could get misconstrued.
First of all, she would waddle through the crowd on her plastic duck and find one or two young guys together. This approach intrigues the guys and of course they would play along and flirt with her. She would then flash her smile and hold up a small, blue cellophane wrapper, with “Manix” written on it. At first the guys find it difficult to see what the product is, and probably think it is candy of some sort. Only when she hands it to one of them do they realize it’s not candy. She then does a coy head tilt, puts on a big smile, and points to the guy’s crotch… just in case he thought it was a candy after all.
She would then hold out her hand… and the guy would finally understand what she really wanted and give her a Euro or two, regardless whether he needs the condom or not..
I bought her last condom, and asked what this was all about? She smiled and winked and said, “My husband doesn’t give a duck about having kids, but I am trying to get pregnant; so I’m selling off our stash of condoms.” Then she winked again and left.
Author’s Note: I took this picture on the Grand Platz in Brussels. I concocted both, the woman’s name and her reason for selling condoms to make a fun story.