I went to an amazing place in Toronto last week, the Bata Shoe Museum. I was skeptical at first, but shoes are an important part of our lives, and this museum covers it from pre-history to the current day.

There was Oetzi’s straw and leather snow boots, you know, the ice age man found frozen in the Alps. Another display showed large wooden platform sandals from African, made for a king who never wanted his feet to touch the ground. In contrast, they also showed the tiniest shoes from China, designed for aristocratic women who had had their feet bound when they were very young.

That was all pretty interesting, but nothing really caught my imagination till I saw these golden sneakers. Now, this blew me away! Who could wear these outrageous shoes and pull it off? It couldn’t be any normal mortal, like you or me… These shoes were made for a legend, a god.

My first thought was the Greek god Apollo, he could carry it off. In Mythology, he drives a golden chariot that pulls the Sun across the sky. He is always depicted as golden, so these gold shoes could easily match his outfit; but wouldn’t the heat of the Sun behind his chariot melt the rubber soles… No, I guess he’s out.

Maybe these shoes should be worn by a King. Midas turns everything he touches to gold so this would fit. But the wings, they would look out of place, and they may even trip him up. A stumbling Midas with his hands out grabbing onto anything to keep from falling… That’s a horrific accident waiting to happen. No, he’s out too.

But why not a woman? These golden shoes are easily fit for a Queen; but when I tried to imagine some woman wearing them, I really couldn’t come up with anything. I guess I lack imagination.

Looking at the shoes more closely, I realized that their defining feature is not their golden colour, but rather their wings. With wings like these, you could break free and fly across life’s stage. And even if you were under pressure, these wings could give you a kind of magic and propel you to the greatest heights. These shoes were made for champions who never bite the dust.

It finally came to me, the perfect person to wear these shoes; he is his own brand, we see his picture everywhere. He is very recognizable, you may have already guessed yourself… It’s Mercury of course… Freddy Mercury.